You are currently browsing the category archive for the '.life.' category.
-digicamography, photoshop-
sorry life.
i am not perfect. never been. but i am doing my best to not fuck up anymore.
so yeah. how about a little break and a good luck streak, right about now?
drove back home with a migraine the size of a small warring african nation in my head due to the congregation of multiple hoe.g, stella.a, singletons and a certain kind of tea of the long island variety in my happy belly.
the migraine, not fun. but the company was good though. met new friends of the banking variety. interesting people.
and also i have managed to help a certain XX break down some walls. but unfortunately i might have done a better job than i could have imagine.
again.
one. singularity. alone. afraid. tired. dark. fear. wound. gaping. swallow. black. hole.
sleep. sleep. sleep.
sweet. sweet. sweet.
zopiclone.
embrace.
love.
Now I am alone. O, what a rogue and peasant slave am I! Is it not monstrous that this player here, But in a fiction, in a dream of passion, Could force his soul so to his own conceit That from her working all his visage wann’d, Tears in his eyes, distraction in’s aspect, A broken voice, and his whole function suiting With forms to his conceit? and all for nothing! For Hecuba! What’s Hecuba to him, or he to Hecuba, That he should weep for her? What would he do, Had he the motive and the cue for passion That I have? He would drown the stage with tears And cleave the general ear with horrid speech, Make mad the guilty and appal the free, Confound the ignorant, and amaze indeed The very faculties of eyes and ears.
-Hamlet Act 2, Scene 2:-
a rule of thumb my dear, little reds should never dance with big bad wolves.
or in your case, since you are such a SW geek: young padawans like you should never tutelage under sith lords like me *smiles*
why do they always get younger as i grow older? i’ve always always drawn the line at single digit age gap, but now it seems i am slowly creeping into the double figure already.
ok heart, let us keep it platonic.
do not reciprocate.
do not reciprocate.
do not reciprocate.
shit. i just got jedi mind tricked. strong is the force in this one *grins*
seriously. fuck this heart of mine. slice it up into ribbons with a lightsaber. really.
-digicamography, photoshop-
the hardcore chinese heartlands. this is familiarity. the sounds and smoke of the 大炒 as i walked towards the gritty stairwell. wary local eyes on me. flickering lights, a few flights up, peeling old beige colored paint on rusty iron grille. faded 門神 staring back at me. they say, ‘hey, i know you’. i smiled back and thought, ‘yeah, long time no see…’
knock knock. 來! muffled chinese dramas behind the plywood door. click. clack. creak. swing. 喂! 朋友! 好耐冇見! big smile. old face. hand shakes. shirtless. faded triad inks. it has been awhile. and i am finally home again, even if it is just for a pick up.
he beckoned me in. i stepped across the threshold into the low cost flat. nothing has changed in the past fifteen years since i was back here. almost everything is the same. faded, but the same. it is like stepping back into a time warp. the television is still playing cantonese serial. the mahjong table, the tiles scattered, is still always ready and waiting.
你點樣呀? 好嗎? he passed me a cigarette. 唔係幾好. i shook my head and smiled. 戒了. we talked for a bit over some warm beers and roasted groundnuts. old friends catching up over lost times. there are many gaps and holes to fill and we did our best to keep each other up to date.
‘by the way, the reason i came over is…’, i said taking an envelope out of my pocket and pushed it to him across the table. he eyed me before picking it up, looked into it and smiled. 但 係有点野你还未戒.
i laughed and said, ‘唔該幫我. 好緊急. fix me up… it’s actually for a friend. he needs it…’
he nodded and gave a hearty pat on my back, ’sure thing. i’ll give you a discount ok? anything for a bro. anytime.’
-nujabes+fat jon: the space between two worlds-
i think the men in my family are afflicted with the stupid heart disease. your truly is included of course, seeing the track record of this wordpress, i seem to have a chronic version of it, fuck. and to which, i would like to argue with a certain XX individual, that it is different than the stupid head ailment.
and the stupid heart disease is ultimately more damaging than the stupid head ailment because of it’s cascading negative effects if the relationship fails. the head has a fail safe mechanism which usually works most of the time. the heart is just like a downhill ride in a car with no brakes. exhilarating for the first few miles but suicidal as the pull of gravity takes over, the bends grow sharper and the speed picks up…
i find that it afflicts men more but do not for once think women are totally immune to it. it is not solely a male only disease. not ever my dear, you wish. it’s like that pesky measles i guess: you will get it only once in your lifetime, if you are lucky…
caught between two extremes and two feelings. i hear you my little brother. i have been there before.
but you cannot deny that this should have been done sooner. saying goodbye has been long overdue. i guess you just needed the push and the reason to do so. and this was it. i am always the bad one it seems. the gfs always say i am. i just radiate an aura of bad influence, so no reason not the play the role that i was given then, i guess? *smiles*
just a word of advice: becareful little brother, tread this relationship with this one carefully. beautiful things like her will almost always break your heart…
dude help
i was rather concerned when i received that sms from a friend, well into a.m.
concerned because the message was too cryptic to glean any useful information from it in regards to the type of trouble he is in and also i myself am halfway to high heaven drinking with another group of friends in hartamas, meaning i might be the one needing help very soon. worried, i texted back asking how he was, if he was okay and has his condition improved. moments later, a reply came back:
bad party. i feel like my liver is escaping my body in the form of vomit. so no it is not an improvement. met a girl, she looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a fire extinguisher by slamming it against her face repeatedly. but i still kissed her and gave her my number when she asked for it. fml.
hilarious.
i just love my drunkard friends. drinkers are funniest people on the face of the planet. ever. especially the inebriated ones *laughs*
the tv glowing in the dark. lukewarm microwaved dinner sitting half eaten beside me. absolut vanilla in coke, delicious. i think i am beginning to get that false sense of hope again. i wish it would go away. because i know where this has gotten me before.
*tap click tap click*
‘…and for sixty nine ninety nine you will get… i will always love you forever, that i promise you. really? yes my love, would i lie to you… and everything is going at half price! hurry now to your nearest store today!”
she said: wait *picks eyelash off his face* ok, another eyelash…
he said: hmm? oh ok.
she said: seems like a lot of people are thinking of you, you geek-boy-man thing you *grins*
he said: what the—! what’s this old wives’ cock and bull shit *laughs* you believe those kind of things?
she said: please! i was told okay. doesn’t necessary means i believe it too.
he said: *continues laughing*
she said: *frowns*
i am curious. old wives’ tales have some truth in it yes? i wonder if you are thinking of me? are you? well, probably just wishful thinking on my part *smiles*
